Everything will be alright...
Be strong...
That is only temporary...
I've been receiving these kind of words lately. I've been suffering... We have been suffering from this tormenting pain for so long. I don't know how much pain will come... I know there will be more. I cannot help my self not to think aboit it. It has been consuming me. I am drowned with tears each day I wake up and each night that I go to sleep.
I can feel the pain even when I'm sleep. This is really torturing me. I refused to eat because my heart is too painful. It's like its being stabbed by a dull knife. I've been always crying... Each time I pray to Him, i cry in pain...In agony. I pray to Him to take away all the pain and give me what I've been longing But He seem not to hear me anymore.
I've been selfish for so long. It's just now that I realized what I have done. I am losing the person that I love so much... I wish I could turn back time and change everything.
We didn't broke up. He just needed some space because he's falling out of love. I cannot blame him, because I've done so much that it hurt him so bad.
Now, I am paying the price. I didn't imagine that this is even worse. That I have to deal with this pain for a long time. I don't want to lose him... I want him and I need him. He became my strength...my everything... He is my bestfriend and I dont want to see him one day, the girl next to him will not be me.
My friends told me we will going to sort everything out. I'm hoping... Praying... But I remember when he went through like this, I was the one by his side... And he gave up everything because he is not happy anymore, even he loves her.
I'm afraid that it might end up like that. I don't know what will I do.
I might go crazy...
This pain I am bearing right now is killing me slowly.
Tormenting me. I'm helpless... I don't know where will I place myself in his heart...in his life...because I was so stupid...
I am praying the price that I have done.
Please forgive me baby...
I want the old us back.
I love you so much...
